I went on the tube yesterday – an every day occurrence for most – a rarity for me! I hate it you see. It’s hot, smelly and I never have a clue what’s going on especially when it stops for ages, in a tunnel, empty, except for some Greek tourists who don’t speak English. But that’s a whole other story.
Also on the tube, I can’t really hear much – so can't listen in on other people's conversations – and as a result I have developed a love of reading all the adverts that line the walls. Over the years I’ve read about impotency clinics and pregnancy vitamins, holidays for singles and ways to find romance – I thought I’d seen everything, until last night.
There I was reading away through instructions of what not to do on the tube: Don’t put feet on seats; Be considerate with your music; Don’t leave it until the last minute before trying to get out; Avoid pulling passengers between stations…
At that point I burst out laughing, much to the disconcertion of the other passengers, and wild images of brief romantic trysts popped into my head (clothes were on – I’m not that filthy-minded!). Unable to believe my eyes I reread the sign again and was rather disappointed when I saw what it actually said:
Avoid pulling the passenger alarm between stations
I think I prefer the first interpretation myself.