What do you do when you can’t leave the past in the past?
When emotions you thought you’d never feel come bubbling to the surface again and no matter how had you try you cannot ignore them?
This week, my past slapped me right across the face, hard! Except, that section of my past is so clueless, it didn’t even know it had done it.
So what did I do?
Well, I called on Tigger and Souper Lou, two of my very best friends and asked them for some advice.
Souper Lou was amazing and offered to cheer me up by going to a festival with me – a whole other story. Tigger put the whole thing in an Excel spreadsheet for me to peruse and deal with at my leisure.
Two equally great mates helping me out.
I think, if I am honest, that I am having my six-monthly deafness wobble. It comes and goes in my life, and I haven’t had one now for a good year. But this week I am quite foot-stampingly cross about my deafness.
The main clue to this was that inbetween, ‘Run away and learn to surf’ and ‘Get a cat’ on the spreadsheet, was ‘Make phone calls better, so that my friends call me more…’
But you see, just recently, I’ve just been wondering if by not making phone calls I am missing out on building the fundamental foundations that build friendships… and this makes me a little sad.
So last night, I called Tigger – the fastest-talking tigger in the Wild West Erm… Country and we spoke, for 41 whole minutes!
Granted there were moments where I didn’t have a merry clue what he was saying, but with a few pardons from me, a few slowing downs from him, we actually had a chat.
The only problem was it was mainly about me, because in order to guess what Tigger might be saying at the other end of the phone and piece it together with the vowel sounds that I can hear, I had to control the subject matter.
So it seems talking on the phone is a great way for my friends to find out more about me… but I might get better at this right? I might find a way to guess better about what the other person is saying?
I hope so, because as I hung up last night, I could feel the deafness fug clearing, I could feel the hope returning, and I could feel Deafinitely Girly getting back to her usual self.
And as for the past that slapped me around the face? Well that’s where I shall leave it. Right there, in the past.